Femi by birth, Clinton by visa.

Another japa series.....

Ep 7

Hello my favorite people, it's your navigator here again to deliver tips on how to successfully enjoy your 20s.

Today guys, I'm going to be telling you about mistakes to avoid if you want to quickly leave this country, so you'll not end up like my Uncle Femi.

We all knew how bad Uncle Femi wanted to leave the country, that was how we received news from my uncle that he was travelling out. Apparently, he has seen sure plug for a Canadian Visa.

Before I go on, Femi is just a made up name because if you think I'll tell you people his real name then you're wrong and you hate me.

Ps: Uncle, if you see this I'm sorry.

*Cries in no remorse*

Back to uncle femi the Canadian, So my uncle said he has seen a sure plug for Canada and they aren't asking for too much that it's just 500,000 naira.

Ehhhh!!! 500k kehhh, in this economy?

Gbam!! That was the first red flag and trust me it gets worse.

So out of curiosity, I asked that how were they going to be transported because I care about my uncle or maybe i was just invested in the gossip.

Lo and behold uncle Femi said it was via ship and that the method was very comfortable for him and it's good because he doesn't like to travel by air.

Excuse me, what?????

That was where I shot Uncle Femi with a bombastic side eye because are you whining me???

I knew there was no redemption for uncle femi when he showed us his international passport.

Ah ah who is bearing Clinton Stone ,Is your name not Femi Olajenyo again?

That's how uncle Femi changed it for my daddy that he should leave him alone and that the organization said that the name would make it easier for him to go to Canada and blend in easily.

Hmm, farewell oh Uncle Femi.

The next time we saw Uncle Femi, he was already with an accent!

That's how he was using his Ibadan Canada accent to tell me that I should finish school fast so I'm going to come and join him there

Are you playing Uncle Femi?

You that they want to go and use to do slave trade!!

Had it been I know you now, I give you a dirty slap!!!

Guys, could you believe that Uncle Femi had already planned the name that I'll be bearing once I got there.

Guys go crazy and guess what the name was.

They're supposed to stone anybody that gives their child that name for real.

Fast forward to a month later, no word from my Canada uncle.

Second month passed, still no Clinton of Canada.

Third month came, no news.

After four months, we were already thinking that Uncle Femi has cut us off because nobody could get through to him.

Shortly after that, Glory be to God, Uncle Femi came back ohh.

If we didn't know that uncle Femi went to Canada, we'd think that he went to the north and was doing hard labour for four months!!

Uncle femi was black eiiiiiii

Black is even an understatement!

"Uncle Femi,how was Canada?"

As those words left my mouth, the bombastic side eye that followed it could open the ground and swallow me.

Uncle Femi story no be for here because he went through a lot and back.

He saw the seven wonders of the world but in a different dimension if you know you know.

I'm going to make a part two on Uncle Femi's story because that one deserves a full episode to itself.

Anyway, before you people jump into conclusions, if you want Canada plug, my uncle Femi still has the only problem is that you might not end up in Canada but at least you'll leave Nigeria.

Still your favorite navigator,

Aimee.

Xoxo.